Feeling Inadequate? : 5 Things to Do When You Feel Like You’re Not a Good Dance Teacher.

Are you a worrywart?

If you are, you’re not alone.

I am too.

 Especially when it comes to my art and most specifically, teaching dance. Nothing can get me riled up in the exact same way that thoughts of a class that didn’t quite go my way can. It’s incredible how quickly I can spiral into a fretful mess which generally ends in convincing myself that I’m just not a good teacher–a failure, pretty much.

So, I’m sitting here.

Today wasn’t anything remarkable. Nothing very extraordinary or out of the ordinary happened. I taught my classes, responding to freelance writing related emails and ghost-wrote a non-fiction book in between. Sure, I taught for the third time ever at a new dance school and it didn’t go particularly well, but that was only two classes out of about twenty which is around what I teach each week. And yet, out of all of the classes and/or creative endeavors that could be weighing on my mind, which one do you think currently occupies my thoughts? You guessed it—the two that I feel didn’t go well.

It doesn’t matter that many things this week were successful.

Still, all I can think about are the class I taught at that new school.

As I sit in my apartment with my slumbering cat at my feet (a warm, purring little ball of fur who is currently quite the opposite of her overwrought owner), my mind won’t stop replaying my failures from the last hour and 45 minutes of my day over and over again.

Want to know what this replay looks like?

To start things off, I had trouble connecting my iPhone to the speaker so that I could play music for my ballet class. I thought I’d tried everything, including turning up the volume, but no sound came out.

Finally, I asked the front desk lady for some help. I wanted to sink into the floor when she fiddled around a bit before saying “Looks like the volume just needed to be turned up.” I had tried that, but I guess I hadn’t made it loud enough. There were already little girls in the room and I was afraid the music might start blasting if the sound decided to kick in and the volume was up. Still, such a mistake doesn’t exactly make me look like the sharpest tool in the shed.

But it gets worse.

In the classes that followed this incident, nothing I said or did kept the attention of my new little students who still aren’t quite used to me yet.

I tried everything. We played games with the promise of stickers as a reward for correct answers. I told them stories about the places we were going to visit with our fantastic dance moves. I brought out scarves and butterflies and put on princess music. In spite of my efforts, the girls were set on doing the exact opposite of what I instructed them to do.

Then, just to cement the fact that I already felt like a dufus deeper into my worrying mind, I started to wrap up class early, telling the girls to take their tap shoes off and get ready for stickers before I realized that I still had fifteen minutes. I suddenly realized that I’d spaced the fact that this class didn’t start on the hour like my others. I caught myself and told the girls to put their shoes back on so we could tap a little longer, but yikes. Just yikes.

Now as I sit alone with my thoughts, I’ve tried reminding myself that it’s always a little rough getting to know an entirely new group of kiddos while simultaneously figuring out where their last teacher left off. I’ve reminded myself that the front desk lady (who witnessed all of my shortcomings of the day) told me not to worry for a moment when I apologized for my ineptitude. You know what? It isn’t helping. Not at all.

I really just want to crawl into bed and watch dance movies and not think about much of anything. By the way, there’s nothing wrong with a great dance movie, but I understand, it doesn’t fix everything.

I keep thinking: You’ve successfully taught so many classes before, so there’s no way you’re going to be a complete failure at this school with these two groups of kids. Yet, my mind continues to spin thoughts which speak the contrary.

The kids hated your class, my thoughts tell me.

The absentees from today’s classes probably didn’t like you last week and are never coming back, my mind says.

The parents watching probably wish that their girls could have the old teacher back, my head assures me.

I’m willing to bet that I’m not the only teacher who has ever found herself in this situation. Feeling inadequate and as if you’ve suddenly forgotten how to do your job is terrible.

So, what is one to do when she feels like she flunked teaching and is thinking that she doesn’t have what it really takes to teach her art form? From one teacher to another, here are a few things I do when I find myself in this slump of feeling like I missed the mark and that I am just not cut out for the role of teacher:

1. Put things into perspective

Let’s get one thing straight: not every class is going to come off exactly as you hoped it would. Not every exercise, game, or teaching method you try is going to be a success. Part of being human is understanding that things don’t always work out the way we planned them in our heads.

Remember that this doesn’t make you a failure as a teacher.

Teacher’s may be the most knowledgeable ones in the room, but that does not mean he or she can expect to be perfect all the time. Taking a moment to accept the fact that we all have bad days is important. But, think back on the good days you’ve had too while you’re at it. If you’ve had good days in the past, they’ll come up again for you, I promise.

2. Drink some water

Okay, time to look at the reasons you’ve had a meltdown about a failed class anyway. When I take a look at why I’m being so emotional, it usually turns out that I’ve skipped self-care that day (or week!). Am I dehydrated? Grab a glass of water and drink up because a little H2O might be all you need when it comes to balancing out your thoughts. We all know it’s essential for athletes to stay hydrated and teachers are athletes, so clear up a little of the fogginess with some water and then take another look at what you’re worrying about.

3. Eat something

Sticking with the self-care check, here’s another item to think about when you’re feeling rather dramatic about something that isn’t going to matter in a month or even in a week. Trust me, I know how easy it is to put aside food when you’re rushing from class to class and have a busy schedule. Unfortunately, the end of the day is when we generally have enough time to stop and contemplate how our classes went. If you’re like me you’re often tired by nighttime.

And hungry.

So, before you make any judgments about the success or failure of your day, eat some dinner (since I know you’ve probably only had one meal today, if that! Yup, I know who you are and you’r not fooling me). I tend to gravitate toward something filling and comforting, yet healthy. After a long day, a leafy salad with oil dressing doesn’t quite cut it, so I go for meals like pasta and veggies or rice with chicken or fish. I find that after recharging with some carbs and protein, I’m far more capable of thinking things through more logically.

More often than not, artists expect to be able to run on nothing. But if the tank is empty, you’re leaving yourself with yet another issue to contend with as you’re simultaneously trying to process the full day of teaching you just finished. If you’re like me, you’ll be more realistic once the growling of your stomach is silenced.

4. Get some rest

I know this sounds like putting a baby down for the night: food, water, and sleepy-sleep. Hey, some things are so simple that even full-grown adults (and teachers) need to be reminded from time to time, right?

This is perhaps the most obvious solution on the list, but it is so important! Being a teacher is hard work—much harder than most people know. For dance teachers there isn’t only the mental/emotional exhaustion that comes with the territory, but physical fatigue as well since we are required to dance just as much (or more) than our students most of the time.

It seems that most dance teachers are tied to the laws of science in that “an object in motion, stays in motion.” Or at least we think we’re tied to it. But, it’s vital to consciously slow ourselves down so that our bodies and minds have a chance to recover.

So, get some sleep.

The old adage “things will look brighter in the morning” has proven quite true for me when it comes to classroom concerns. Everything looks worse when you’re tired.

5. Plan ahead.

At first glance, this might seem like something a worrier would do. However, I’m not suggesting that you stress yourself out by over-planning. Still, thinking through the things that didn’t work and coming up with a few alternatives to try next time may eliminate some of the feelings of failure. It’ll remind you that you do have other tricks in your teaching repertoire. Reminding myself that there’s a solution and lots of room to improve your results next time always gives me a little extra confidence while simultaneously silencing a few of those feelings of doubt nagging at me.

I hope that trying out these tips will help you press the reset button when you’ve had a rough day of teaching. What are the strategies you use when it’s been a hard day of classes? Please share so that the rest of us can try them out too!

Wanna hear a few more of my thoughts on managing a ‘dance teacher mind reset?’ Take a look at Another Day to Dance: Stopping to Be Thankful For My Legs.

Want to read more about handling the ups and down of teaching dance? Check out Teaching Preschool Ballet and Tap.